Second-time-around couples may be wiser and even more determined than before to make things work when they wed, but if the divorce statistics are grim for first-timers, they are even more sobering among those tying the knot again.

That concern prompted father-and-son counselors Gary and Greg Smalley to write The Heart of Remarriage (978-0-830-74677-4, $22.99, Regal Books), releasing this month. The pair surveyed hundreds of remarried couples to learn more about the particular challenges faced by those for a second time, or more.

The Smalleys concluded that the real issues are not about practicalities like step-parenting—though they are addressed with hands-on advice and ideas—so much as emotional baggage and blind spots from previous relationships.

"In many remarriages, couples get together thinking that their hearts are wide open to each other and will stay that way," they write. "In reality ... the doors are actually closed."

Addressing the need for someone to have an open heart and to provide emotional safety for others they know in successful relationships, the writers acknowledge that much of the first portion of their book is applicable to anyone. They look at how best one can heal from past hurts and establish healthy boundaries.

In the second part of the 256-page hardcover book, they get down to some of the emotional tangles specific to remarriage—unresolved issues with ex-spouses, feelings of guilt and anger, and the different tugs and pulls in blended families. They emphasize the need for the couple's relationship to take prime place if the new stepfamily is to survive and thrive.

Each chapter includes brief Heart Healer ideas and suggestions, Heart Monitor questions for reflection and discussion and Heart Protector advice. The book ends with a series of relationship quizzes to identify areas on which individuals may need to focus.

A publicity campaign with secular and faith media—print, television, radio and Web—in addition to online promotions will support the release.

For more information, go to www.regalbooks.com. To order, call 800-4-Gospel.

The behind-the-scenes principles that guide the film couple's life

Oscar-winning film The Blind Side told the story of black NFL player Michael Oher, who was adopted by white parents Leigh Anne and Sean Tuohy and their two children. Now, in the new Henry Holt book, In a Heartbeat: Sharing the Power of Joyful Giving, the Tuohys share the lessons they have learned in giving, not only by adopting Michael, but also in ways as simple as tithing and being present to the needs around them

Leigh Anne, an interior designer, decided early on that her mission was to raise children who would become "cheerful givers." Sean, who grew up poor but now owns a large number of fast-food franchises, said he believed that one day he could provide a home that would be "a place of miracles."

"When you give because you want to see the results or you give because of the results or you give hoping for a result, that means you're giving with some sort of an agenda," Sean Tuohy said. "And I don't think that's what (the Bible) means by 'cheerful giver.' "

Along with the cheerful giving principle from Scripture, the couple lives by what they term the Popcorn Theory.

"If you throw all the kernels to the bottom of the pan and it starts heating up, well, all those kernels look alike, but those kernels have needs and wants you don't really know," Sean said. "The one that really needs it the worst will pop up and hit you right in the face."

Michael was transformed because of the family's generosity as they opened their hearts to him, and they still work with inner-city kids, but the Tuohys don't think every giver has to do something grand.

"Yes, we adopted a 16-year-old kid that obviously had needs, but that's no better or no greater than somebody who looks at the little red bucket at Christmastime and puts quarters in it," Sean said. "They do it with a cheerful heart and it has the same effect in God's eyes."

Giving 10% of their income to God has also become important to the family.

"I had always gone to church and given, but it was never something that I understood exactly what I was doing, I just thought I was supposed to do it," Sean said. "The premise that it wasn't that you're giving what's left over, but you're giving your first tenth had a huge impact on me.

"Then the biggest impact was that if you're not doing it with a cheerful heart, then God really doesn't want it, so you really need to get your heart right. That was the big change in our family and certainly in my heart."

All three Tuohy children—Collins, Sean Jr. and Michael—contribute to the book, as do actors from The Blind Side, Tim McGraw and Sandra Bullock, who won an Academy Award for Best Actress for The Blind Side. The couple still maintains a relationship with the stars.

"We couldn't be more happy with the people that portrayed us (in the movie)," Sean said, adding, "My wife and Sandy talk all the time. There is no reason before this movie that they would have ever had this relationship with us, but it was probably the other way around."

The Tuohys are not holding themselves up as an example to the detriment of others. Rather, Sean said: "We're not trying to teach anybody a lesson. I think what we are trying to tell people with this book is that we have just as many warts as anybody else, we just happen to have our names tagged to the characters of the movie, but that doesn't excuse us nor does it excuse you from really finding that place in your heart to do stuff for others."

For more information on the 288-page hardcover book, visit www.henryholt.com. To order, call 888-330-8477.

Latest project: Spiritual Parenting: An Awakening for Today’s Families (David C. Cook).

Resides in: Costa Mesa, Calif.

Currently reading: Shaped by the Word by Robert Mulholland (Upper Room Books) and Brennan Manning’s The Furious Longing of God (David C. Cook).

What is the theme behind Spiritual Parenting?

“Oftentimes when people hear ‘spiritual parenting,’ they think of maybe perfect parenting, but I really wanted to get back to the root of what spiritual parenting is. Things that are spiritual are things that are eternal, so I like to say that spiritual parenting isn’t perfect parenting—it’s parenting from a spiritual or eternal perspective. I feel that oftentimes we can immerse ourselves with good parenting techniques that are really not eternal. They just help us get through the day. Those things are needed and those things are essential. But I really felt like there was a void out there to the things that mattered most to me when I was raising my children and that was really getting at the heart, and I longed for a place to discuss those things and a place where we could be inspired.”

What are some of the practical ways of spiritual parenting?

“There’s nothing magical about it. God was really calling me away from just trying to manage their behavior so they would look clean and shiny on the outside, that I wouldn’t be embarrassed as a parent and people would think we did this job well. And also out of fear—as God was pulling me away from managing my children’s behavior, He inspired me to do something bigger and more, which is to create environments in my home where the Holy Spirit would be the person that’s involved in my child’s life. He would do that when and as He chose. I couldn’t control that. In that moment I wanted that bad behavior to stop, although I could do it for that moment, I couldn’t really heal what was in the heart of my child. And so I didn’t want a false security that I was just dealing with the outside and there wasn’t a transformation on the inside. It really came down to: What’s my part? If God’s part is to transform, then my part is to create environments in my home where He can freely be at work. The book talks about faith in the beginning and how that has to be our goal, but then it untucks 10 environments that have practical life stories, how I messed up, how I just so needed to depend on God and what my children’s experiences were in those environments.”

How do you approach people about their own parenting techniques?

“I don’t espouse a technique, but ask parents to surrender themselves and their techniques. ... When I encounter parents from all different kinds of techniques and backgrounds, I think it’s something freeing about this for them. We just pile guilt on ourselves. We pile a lot of pressure that God never intended. There’s something freeing about releasing that.”

Authors Larry and Chuck Bates of IRN USA Radio News arm readers with advice on how to handle the economic, political and religious storms America faces, in A Nation in Crisis: The Meltdown of Money, Government, and Religion (978-1-616-38148-6, $22.99, hardcover), released this month from FrontLine, an imprint of Strang Book Group.

The authors—who say they are not “doom and gloomers”—offer their assessment of American financial, political and religious institutions, but say, “life as we have known it in the United States is about to change, and change drastically.”

“We really believe you can position yourself for great financial opportunity, but you can also get your family and yourself out of harm’s way and turn the chaos into blessing for yourself and others,” they write in the book’s introduction.

Working from backgrounds in economics, banking and government, the authors offer an analysis of the state of America’s financial institutions, blaming the economic meltdown on five forces—a major banking crisis, federal debt and deficits, business and personal loans, recession and depression, and major inflation—and call on readers to build a “financial ark.”

The authors also consider government and what its role is and should be. They explain the ways the government taxes its citizens and what effect the economic stimulus has.

In matters of faith, they show how the church can fill the gap for fatherless families and discuss public education.

Former bank executive Larry Bates is publisher and editor of Monetary and Economic Review, and a former member of the Tennessee House of Representatives.

Economist Chuck Bates is executive vice president and news director of IRN USA Radio News; he previously served as an assistant in the White House Office of Political Affairs.

For more information, visit www.strangbookgroup.com. To order, call Strang Book Group at 800-283-8494.

Author examines popular interpretations of data and finds the positive

Bradley Wright, a professor of sociology at the University of Connecticut, takes aims at some commonly held, statistically inspired myths in Christians Are Hate-Filled Hypocrites...and Other Lies You’ve Been Told: A Sociologist Shatters Myths From the Secular and Christian Media.

Wright was inspired to tackle the subject as he tracked societal data from academic journals, which he soon saw ran contrary to statistics reported by the news media and even Christian researchers. He started a blog, beginning with a challenge on divorce rates, which provided the basis for his debut book.

“I’d heard time and time again that Christians get divorced more than non-Christians and that just turned out to be completely wrong,” he said. “I published that on my blog about two or three years ago and began to think, ‘there’s more to the story here than just divorce rates.’ ”

Challenging some of the notions behind the best-selling book UnChristian by Dave Kinnaman and Gabe Lyons (Baker Books/Baker Publishing Group) that non-Christians have increasingly worse attitudes toward Christians, Wright contends that attitudes “have actually gotten better in the past two decades.” Even more surprising, he said, is that the group with the stronger dislike of Christians is older people.

“That’s very different than ‘the young people really don’t like us, and they’re liking us less every year,’ ” he said.

Wright believes some of the reporting he challenges comes with “good intentions,” he said. Still, he said too many of the messages are based on fear and are “ultimately counterproductive.”

Since data leaves room for interpretation, Wright is open to being corrected.

“My allegiance is to the data, not the positions,” he said. “It doesn’t benefit me either way to be positive or negative. Having said that, this is not the type of argument I would lose.”

For more information, visit www.bakerpublishinggroup.com, or to order, call Baker Publishing Group Customer Service at 800-877-2665.

Latest project: Reborn to Be Wild (David C. Cook)

Resides in: Glendora, Calif.

Currently reading: Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton and just finished re-reading John Steinbeck’s East of Eden.

What was the inspiration for Reborn to Be Wild?

“I was agreeing with another theologically trained church leader about the excesses and dangers of the ‘Emergent’ church when God’s Spirit broke in with this rebuking thought, ‘You sound just like the church leaders who shamed and discouraged you back then!’ Back then, when I was part of an extreme movement of younger Christians; back then, when our hearts were full of unusual ideas about Jesus and His church; back then, when we were the ones church people talked about in sentences full of mistrust and shame. I realized right then that I miss the Jesus Movement, not the lifestyle of the ’60s, but what it felt like to be a part of a revival. That dissatisfaction with my own spiritual status quo led me on this journey that resulted in this book.”

Did you have your own spiritual reawakening?

“There have been several, the most dramatic being my battle with leukemia that is chronicled in my book When God Breaks Your Heart. I came to realize that I had allowed the institutional church to tame my wild heart. I simply wanted to go all out for Jesus in the same radical way we did during the Jesus Movement.”

What are some of the lies that believers have accepted as truth?

“I’m sure of at least six lies we Jesus Movement converts believed that sidetracked our revival and tamed our wild hearts. Here are a few of them: ‘Bigger is better’—we threw our energy into building megachurches that marketed Jesus instead of doing the hard work of disciple-making. Another one is that ‘it’s all mine’—this is the lie we most wanted to believe. We allowed convoluted interpretations of Jesus’ teachings on money to explain away our materialism and we’ve paid a huge spiritual price. Another lie is that ‘power is good’—we were the generation that brought down the presidency of Lyndon Johnson. We understood the power of politics, and too many times, let the politics of the right define us.”

What are the main culprits driving church-goers to complacency?

“I believe Christians want something real. We’re tired of plastic Christianity and life-in-the-suburbs mythologies that let us wiggle out of the hard sayings of Jesus. We also seem to have forgotten that Christianity is a supernatural endeavor. Words like ‘faith’ and ‘transformation’ seem to have given way to self-help spiritualities and campus-building programs.”

What are the positive signs you see in today’s generation?

“They’re fed up with the emphases on size and sizzle. They want to do something for the Lord Jesus. They don’t know exactly what they want, but they want to experience true spiritual community and make a tangible difference for Christ. They remind me of … well, us—the Jesus Movement rockers who lost our way. I hope this book can help them avoid the same mistakes we made.”